The Intelligence Pill
by cookieangel22
Summary: What happens when Sakura, the most dense being in the realm of CCS, becomes...intelligent?In which Touya makes an uncharacteristic slip and causes reality to flip backwards. Throw in the CCS gang and you get a party. S&S and hints of others later.


**This is pretty much my first fanfic so ratings and reviews would be very much appreciated, thanks x)**

**Disclaimer: I sadly do not own CCS or anything I have briefly referred to in this fanfic. All rights go to Clamp and the creators of whatever I have mentioned. I only own this story.**

The story is set after the Final Judgement, but before the famous power transfer between Touya and Yukito. Enjoy x)

The Intelligence Pill-chapter 1 (\

"So, Hiragizawa…Eriol, is it?" the dark haired teen, or should I say, _man,_ asked skeptically, but failed to hide a small smile which spread slowly and wistfully on his framed face.

"Yes, and like magic do I have a deal for you." The bespectacled, saphire haired boy…teen…man…reincarnation…dude…smiled and winked at his intended pun.

"Of course you do. How else would you be so very well…" the _man _glanced briefly around the room, or should I say _hall_, "accommodated?"

If anything, the _hall_ was spacious; Ouran's-Third-Floor-Music-Room spacious, but large for a domestic _hall _nonetheless. Due to the fact that, one, the owner was once the greatest magician that ever lived, two, the owner runs a small…could I say _business_ in exchanging enchanted objects, and three, there was practically nothing in it besides a lit fireplace and a sleek, bewitched, curvy crimson armchair of which intertwines with a long, magical history. Of course, the second reason was why the two men stood there that very day.

The blue boy, namely _Eriol_, chuckled. The kind of chuckle that you'd expect from some malicious esper who had just discovered some new incredible ability from his very fingertips. "I think, Kinomoto-san, that you'd be very interested in…" he paused dramatically to withdraw a small packet from a pocket (try saying that) of his favourite light blue cardigan, obviously satisfied as it gained the right effect, "this." He smiled his wistful little smile as _Kinomoto_ bore a look of subtle amusement at it.

"And this is?..?" Kinomoto gazed at it skeptically. Within the plastic packaging held a single, little pill.

Once again, a flash of a devious smile on his face. When has this boy ever misjudged? "An intelligence pill, Kinomoto-san."

"Intelligence pill?" He seemed to finally get the gist of everything, and now he could play along with the wit. "Gee, I wonder what it does." A small smile placed itself on his lips, chocolate brown eyes flashing. See what I mean?

"As do I" Eriol fiddled with the packet, "but let me give you some tips." glasses flashing mischievously, he continued, "There are more ways to use it than you can imagine-not just for passing an important exam."

Oops. Kinomoto's (just wait a while before I use his first name, alright?) gist-of-the-situation just snapped like a weak, overstretched elastic band, as shown by his slight shift in composure which, let's just say for the sake of simplicity, showed a tragically uncharacteristic look of slight confusion. Not like you'd notice unless your name was Tomoyo Daidouji or the like. You'd find it funny how someone I described as a _man _would not be able to follow the witty ways of a young _boy..teen…_I shall not repeat the sequence, but times change in a (first-time) magical girl shojou fanfic.

Eriol, to Kinomoto's displeasure, gave a mocking sigh. "It can make the job of…explaining things…especially your situations…easier. You don't have to limit it to only one certain person's use." He smiled again. Something he likes doing, smiling.

Kinomoto's eyes lit up, much like another certain young member of his family (*hint hint*) "I see…" his thoughts jumped to a certain grey haired amber eyed snow bunny. And no, I do not mean Chappy the Bunny; sorry Rukia. "I'll take them."

"Glad to do business with you, Kinomoto Touya." Eriol's smooth voice sang as he examined his new fresh cheque. _That's more than enough for a month's subscription to shounen jump!_

Touya grunted in response. The possibilities were endless…Now he could finally explain to his best friend about his other self…and if he's lucky, he could even explain some more about himself and his feeli.…

"Oh, and Touya," Eriol called from behind with a big Ootori-Kyouya-worthy smile as Touya was about to leave (with an even bigger smile, but definitely nowhere near the Ootori-Kyouya-Genius category), "be careful with it. Make sure it doesn't fall into the…wrong hands."

Touya narrowed his eyes. _Something's definitely up._ But he shruggedit off, as the prospect of later meeting with his best friend, or should he say bo…that little signature Kinomoto Touya smile came to play again.

"Sure thing, 'Gizawa."

The thud of the ancient wooden door signaled his depart. Eriol slumped (in that professional ancient way) onto his crimson armchair, sighing. "Emotions can get the best of everyone." His chuckle echoed through the hall.

But I understand what he means (no, not because I wrote this fic); you'd assume that anyone, especially someone as intelligent as Touya, would wonder why there was only one single pill in the packet. Suspicious, no?

* * *

><p>"Hoeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! What do I do now!"<p>

No doubt, this familiar, signature cry came from a familiar, (not really) signature person in the kitchen. (F.Y.I., its pronounced huh-weahhhh, not hoe as in something inappropriate for such a story).

Chestnut brown bangs fell over dulled, emerald eyes. Is that burning I smell? Ah, yes, poor little girl has yet a lot to learn. She took the wooden spoon from the smoking pan and poked at its contents. Let me take a closer look; wires…I mean noodles, burnt, crispy noodles.

"It's ruined!" she pouted in that cute way of hers. Why don't we wait for a short soliloquy to explain how this tragedy came to be?

"I only wanted to have a short chat with Tomoyo-chan! Why did this have to happen? And…and…" comical tears began to form on her face, "_Yukito-san_ is coming for dinner!" She sat in that defeated Suou Tamaki way in the corner, wailing about life's tragedy of burnt food. "Why can't stoves switch themselves off?"

A key was turned outside the door; someone's home. Who is it? That shall be explained right about…now.

"I'm home! Sakura?" Touya's suspicious wider-than-usual smile dropped a bit at the silence. Not like anyone would notice, unless your name was Daidouji Tomoyo or the like. _Is she okay..?_

_It's onii-chan!_ Sakura bit her lip nervously. _What's he gonna do when he finds out that I…_ "hoeee…"

"Sakura?" he called again. "Monster!"

That did it.

Fuming, Sakura ditched her earlier worries, stomping comically (and very loud-ly) into the hallway. "I. AM. NOT. A. MONSTER." Invisible steam was bursting from her nose. Not like anyone would know, since it's invisible. Haha.

"There you are," said Touya casually, "hey listen-about dinner tonight-"

_Oh no…_Sakura's eyes widened_. Don't ask anything don't ask anything!_

"Don't cook. I'll do it."

Obviously not what our heroine was expecting. "ehh?"

Touya gave a look of mock confusion. "Oh? You don't understand? And I thought I used pretty basic words…" A sudden pain in the lower regions silenced him immediately.

"But why?" Hurray, a useful sentence had escaped Sakura's lips. Her innocent emerald eyes looked up curiously at her brother, the way you'd expect Inoue Orihime would whilst watching some crazy cooking show.

For the first time ever, Touya had to pause to answer such a simple question. Of course, Sakura wouldn't have noticed as he contemplated how to form an innocent answer to his sister.

"Because," he began matter-of-factly, "I have something very important to discuss with Yuki today, and I don't need your monstrous cooking to scare him away. No pun intended." Sakura comically balled her fist face-high and fumed internally at being mocked once again by _onii-chan_, much like a clone of Aisaka Taiga being called short. Touya smirked at his own genius; it had gained the desired effect. Nothing like some mockery to distract them from the key part of a sentence. "Now if you'll excuse me," Touya continued, relaxed after his success, "I have an evident," _sniff sniff _, "mess to clear up for a guest." Another smack of pain at his lower regions sent him bouncing into the kitchen immediately.

_Time to get to work, _Touya smiled.

But he realised that he'd have to work pretty fast, as Sakura had left him virtually nothing to start off with (remember the wir-I mean pasta?). No matter to Touya the Expert-Deal-with-Sakura's-Mistakes-er. Pulling out the ingredients he had bought fresh from the market, he decided to start with making soup. I mean, how else would he dissolve the pill for his guest?

* * *

><p>A crisp, clear <em>ding-dong<em> pierced the excited atmosphere that had built up around Sakura in the past however long. Her eyes lit up instantly as she bounced up onto her feet, shouted "Coming!" and ran like a ninja with shunpo (but with the loud, rhythmic thumps that matched her feet, she obviously was anything but) to the door, as if Ron Weasley had just appeared and clicked his Deluminator. In a split second, the door slammed wide open like a mirror to Sakura's loud excitement, and there stood their bespectacled guest, smiling his warm, perpetual smile.

"Yukito-san!" came Sakura's always bubbly greeting. And of course, Yukito could always handle such situations where a cute little girl would be staring up at him with sparkly eyes with utmost familiarity, atleast in the case of Touya's little sister. "Good evening, Sakura-chan," he looked around curiously, "where's Touya?"

"Onii-chan's in the kitchen!" Poor Sakura; being the clueless slave to something that'll eventually make her cry. One could say that her simplicity is a curse, or a natural defense system to prevent her getting hurt easily from things around her. Is the cup half empty or half full?

Yukito's composure seemed to relax a little at the information, not like you'd notice unless your name was Daidouji Tomoyo or the like. "Okay-I'll just sit down for a bit then." _Dinner's obviously not ready. And I don't have an excuse to go see him in the kitchen or something…_

"This way!" Sakura was all too eager to stick around and show her good side to him as much as possible, even if it meant showing him the way in a house he spent more time in than his own. Yukito, being Yukito, chuckled; though his reasons could be argued over.

"Where's Kinomoto-san?" came Yukito's ice-breaking sentence. A good idea too; having a little girl staring at you in "hanyan" mode with you sitting in silence is rather awkward to enjoy.

"Oh, he's out for the week at another archaeological dig," bubbly, ecstatic, cute, sweet, happy response to having a conversation with Yukito, "how…how're your grandparents?" If they actually exist, that is. I do wonder sometimes.

Anyway, some typical Yukito-Sakura chit-chat took place, with Yukito glancing occasionally at the open kitchen, where one can easily catch a glimpse of the back of a hard working Touya. Eye candy, anyone?

* * *

><p>"That was delicious! Thanks for the invite, Touya!"<p>

"I…I was supposed to cook for us, but…but onii-chan insisted that he do it instead!"

"I'll bring us soup." Touya said dismissively. Was that a slight note of embarrassment?

With a slightly annoyed aura, he stalked off to the kitchen. Not like you'd notice unless your name was Tomoyo Daidouji or the like.

The aromatic yet homey waft of a homemade broth signaled the completion of Touya's little 'project'. Well, the soup at least. With such a large excitement and anticipation build up (but collected and bottled up, since its Touya afterall), you'd expect the Requiem for a Dream soundtrack to be whispering in the background. With a look in Touya's eyes which mirrored the infamous staring contests between him and keroberos, he withdrew the little package from earlier on. Right on the first beat of a phrase of Requiem for a Dream, he carefully tore the top of the packet off in a neat little line. After skeptically staring down the pill for any signs of trickery from the little ex-great wizard, he decided it was safe, and cautiously freed it from the open packet with his thumb and index finger. I mean, it could still explode in his face at contact at any moment, no?

Right; In front of him lay three tantalizing bowls of steaming hot broth on a tray. Yukito was sitting essentially in the middle, so it'd only be natural for him to take the one in the middle, yes? Oh, but what if he, being Yukito, decided to be polite and kindly pick up the bowl in the middle for someone else? Or if Sakura over-reacted in his presence (which happened often) and randomly (and frantically) took whatever bowl first met her glance and it ended up being the one in the middle? What if Yuki decided to take another bowl instead? What if…What if… Touya scratched his head, like a mirror to Kurosaki Ichigo.

"_Make sure it doesn't fall into the…wrong hands."_

Too many possible outcomes; too risky. No choice-he'll have to play polite and hand everyone the bowls; starting with Sakura to avoid any suspicion. Yes, yes, then…

Even the most collected-ly cool minds can get a bit fussy. Kinomoto Touya's no exception. So whilst he was fussing excessively over his calculations in his collected silence, he failed to hear light, slightly concerned footsteps approaching the kitchen.

"Is everything alright, Touya?" Yukito's smile was exchanged for a soft, concerned expression. Oh no, Touya's chill-like-a-refrigerator wall just crumbled.

Several things happened at once; his hands gave an involuntary jerk, a _plop_ was heard; something fell in the soup, Touya's eyes widened in shock (and for him, that's really saying something), he jerked his head around faster than what is considered healthy for a human, realised what he did was strange, relaxed his eyes to hide it, realised what happened to the pill and exploded inside. Imagine a pokemon self-destructing inside a pokeball; chaotic, cacophonic, but completely unseen on the outside. _Crap…_

Yes, despite being an all-powerful chill-on-the-outside top-notch spirit-sensor, he still has the ordinary kinks of the ordinary person.

"…Touya?" Yukito's soft, questioning gaze broke him away from his trance.

"Huh?" said Touya, as if slapped awake whilst sleeping for a split second. Of course, this naturally concerned Yukito. Touya definitely wasn't right today. So, naturally, he proceeded with caution; a wrong Touya is rarely seen, therefore a possible threat.

"Do…should I help carry the soup out?" Touya froze. Yukito _helpfully_ eyed and pointed at the bowls on the tray-now with less steam-lest this Rarely-Seen Touya didn't understand. One never knows.

"Uh…" _wait-no! Not yet! The pill; yes, not until I find out which one it fell into. Maybe it hasn't dissolved yet and I can find a trace of pill powder. If only he left the room…oh but his company is so…never mind that! _He practically slapped himself, not like you'd notice unless your name was Daidouji Tomoyo or the like. "It's ok. I'll do that later; you just relax outside for the time being." Signature Touya smile anyone? _There. That seemed normal enough._

Yukito relaxed slightly, but wasn't completely fooled. I mean, he practically just told him to go away! What kind of Touya _does_ that? "Alright then, but tell me if anything's wrong." He left at that note.

If he was anyone but I'm-So-Collected Touya, he would have found some smooth surface and pretty much comically slid vertically downwards, but no. Anyway, back to fanfiction reality, and essentially, the plot that has hardly moved forward in these thousand words. _Which bowl of soup?_

Now for the moment fangirls all wait for-an exclusive sneak peek into Touya's mind. :D Not really.

_Well, technically, it doesn't matter which pill the soup falls in. There's already a 1/3 of a chance that _he'd_ get it. And even if he doesn't, I can always get another. That kid lives easily within biking range. Unless his house gets bulldozed because some, I don't know, theme park is gonna be built there. But chances are that won't happen. _

_No losses. And I can always invite him over and try again._

Smiling the Touya smile, he picked up the tray and sprang off with a new found subtle confidence. Not like you'd notice unless your name was Daidouji Tomoyo or the like.

* * *

><p>"Delicious! I still find it hard to imagine <em>Touya <em>being a good cook" Yukito chuckled politely. Well duh; as expected from Mr. I'm-So-Perfect Touya. Sakura pouted. "I…I was supposed to make soup until Onii-chan came home and said he'd do it himself!" Sakura was obviously desperate for a bit of attention, as she had said something along the lines of that already.

"Oh, that's rather unlike him," Yukito phrased it carefully, glancing briefly at Touya, obviously concerned about his unusual behavior, but as he saw him glare sideways-as usual-he relaxed, "but he did a great job nonetheless."

"Yeah, I guess" Sakura poked her soup, "the soup is pretty good-even better than usual for onii-chan standards." Ohohohoho, 'Kura being completely unaware that she's saying something very important. Her words snapped "Onii-chan" out of his trance with, you could say, three little yellow lines next to his head. He glanced around; _Yukito finished his soup!_

"Oi, Yuki," Touya cleared his throat as Sakura enjoyed her soup with occasional noises, an attempt to hide his always-subtle emotions; is that a blush?

"What's…What's 2678 multiplied by 785?"

The man in question simply stared blankly back at him. "Do you need a calculator, Touya?" Indeed, this alien Touya is definitely a bit whacked today.

_Dang that Hiiragizawa. How am I supposed to know how to test this thing anyway? What if this thing doesn't even work? What if it's gonna make him _less _smart? What if…what if it really explodes inside him? Oh I knew it…I knew it….*facesmack*_

Somewhere across the table, a head clicked upwards unnaturally as the room went void of any voices or slurping sounds.

"That'd be 2,102,230. And are you all right? That action _and_ expression is very uncharacteristic of you. Perhaps an internal dilemma is being hidden beneath that perpetually smooth façade of yours? Or is there something that you had put in a bowl of soup that has somehow reached you, Onii-chan?"

Shock. One mouth dropped wide open and four eyes grew very, very wide; two of which were very, very uncharacteristic. Zaraki Kenpachi could've just reached hollowfication and bankai and blew up the whole city of Tomoeda, and they would never have noticed. Your name doesn't need to be Tomoyo Daidouji or the like to recognize it.

"_be careful with it. Make sure it doesn't fall into the…wrong hands." He knew it; he knew it all along, didn't he? That kid. _

_Oh crap._

**A/N: *bows randomly* thank you thank you xD There you go, my very first chapter of my very first fanfic. Hope you liked it *crosses fingers*. I'll probably update soon, and I promise a lot of Tomoeda elementary drama :D **

**Next chapter: What happens when Intelligent Sakura goes to school with a flushed Shaoran, the infamous omniscient pair of Tomoyo and Eriol, and the rest of the group? Interesting things, fluff and revelations, I tell you. (:**


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